Self-awareness and self-love.

I think the hardest part of losing my mom was learning to be my own mother. I have learned how to comfort myself and support myself. I have learned to dry my own tears and pat myself on the back. I have learned that small accomplishments deserve smiles and small failures do not deserve (many) tears.

I have learned that I need to have my own back. The person I would come home upset to is myself, and I needed to learn how to take care of myself. At the end of the day, the only person I have is myself. Losing my mom taught me that very difficult lesson that I am still coming to terms with today.

At the end of the day, I have to remind myself that nothing is too big of a deal. I’ve already dealt with a shitload of problems (that could’ve ideally been more spread out instead of in the span of 3 years), so honestly. I just have to tell myself that I will be okay. I have dealt with worse. And I will be okay.

 

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3 thoughts on “Self-awareness and self-love.

  1. You will be OK, better than OK.

    The obvious point in all of these is this: You write with your heart in it, and very nicely.

    I feel your loss (not exactly you feel), Armita’s loss, and obviously my own loss.

    No one understands that, I mean it.

    A couple of hours ago I talked to one of our family. She asked me: “Is it almost 2 years that your wife passed away?” I replied: “Almost.” Then she said: “Pretty soon you guys forget it!!!”
    Can you believe the ignorance?!

    I am dealing with that type of thinking on regular basis, friends and family. They all think “Time Heals.” Unfortunately TIME DOE NOT HEAL Or you can say Time Heals but Time could be INFINITE (for me) or very short for someone like the person who called me.

    Again back to your writing, it is an excellent piece.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Best essay ever aziz delam -at the end we all going to be OK and will be too -that’s the story of our life and soon you will get your peace without having mom or anybody next to you …

    Liked by 1 person

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